Public notice

A standing notice to cold-email “marketers.”

Read this before you send us your template. It will save us both the time.

The policy, plainly

Unsolicited pitches claiming our website is “broken,” our SEO is “failing,” or that we’re “not ranking” — sent cold, by someone who has never spoken to us — are treated as scams. Not as leads, not as feedback. As scams. We are a company that builds its own technology in-house; a stranger with a spreadsheet does not know our site better than the people who wrote every line of it.

Why we can say that with a straight face

This site is hand-built — our own stack, our own servers, our own hardened OS. The technical SEO is already handled: clean titles and descriptions, structured data, canonical URLs, a real sitemap, valid markup, fast first paint. The audit “scores” these emails wave around are the part we control, and we control it. So when a cold email insists it found catastrophic “problems,” it isn’t a diagnosis — it’s a script, sent to ten thousand inboxes at once, hoping someone doesn’t know better.

How the scam actually works

It’s the same playbook every time, and once you see it you can’t unsee it:

  • The fake audit. An automated “report” full of red X’s and scary jargon, generated by a free tool, dressed up as a personal review.
  • The ranking lie. “You’re not #1 on Google!” Nobody is, permanently — rankings shift constantly by location, device and the day. Anyone promising a fixed top spot is selling you a coin flip and pocketing the difference.
  • Manufactured urgency. “Your competitors are pulling ahead,” “act now.” Pressure is the product; the work rarely exists.
  • Borrowed authority. Vague name-drops, a stock “agency” logo, a Gmail address, and a Calendly link. No portfolio you can verify, because there isn’t one.
  • The markup. If any “work” happens at all, it’s the cheapest possible outsource, resold to you at a wild multiple. You pay for a dashboard, not results.

How anyone can spot it — the 10-second test

This part is for every small business that gets these too. If an inbound pitch checks these boxes, close the tab:

  • They contacted you, cold, about problems you never asked them to look at.
  • The “audit” is generic — it would read identically for any site on earth.
  • They guarantee rankings, traffic, or a “#1 spot.” Real practitioners never do.
  • No verifiable portfolio, no real company, no references you can actually call.
  • Urgency and fear do the talking, not specifics about your actual business.

Real help is specific, invited, and honest about what it can and can’t promise. Everything else is noise with an invoice attached.

On notice

Send it anyway, and you go on the record

Consider this fair warning. Cold-email pitches that ignore this notice — especially the ones that fake audits or lie about rankings to manufacture a sale — are documented. Persistent or deliberately deceptive senders can be named here, publicly, exactly as they presented themselves. We don’t chase you; we simply keep the receipts. If your business model only works on people who don’t know better, this page is not on your side.

Actually here to build something real? That’s a different inbox entirely.

Talk to a real builder →